The Connorton Family

February 26, 2017

OUSD Oratorical Winners

Garrett's class won 1st place in the OUSD district wide Oratorical competition, Pre-K through 2nd Grade division. The class performed and won at both the school-wide level and the district semi-final level before winning today. Garrett is the third kid from the right.

They performed an original poem called, "If You Want to Know Me"

Ninja Sleeper

Quotes From Motherhood

"Garrett. Stop farting into the ukulele."

Amber Alert

Where is Lissy?!?

Great Idea

Audrey: Can we make our backyard bigger?
Me: No, it's the size that it is.
Audrey: Oh.
Me: Why do you want it to be bigger.
Audrey: Like, so we could have a hot tub?

Introductions

Audrey: I knew daddy before you.
Me: no, I've known daddy for 15 years and you are only 4.5
Audrey: no. When I was born I met him first.
Me: oh. Well you did live in my body so I would say you knew me first.
Audrey: It was fun in your uterus. I danced around in there.

The Third Way

Me: (pointing to money clip after Audrey scraped it across the table). "Is this soft or hard?"

Audrey: "Yummy"

Audrey Answers

What is something I say to you?
Get dressed

What makes me happy?
Hugs

What makes me sad?
That I'm not listening to you

How tall am I?
68feet

What's my favorite thing to do?
Play with me

What is my favorite food?
Ice cream

What is my favorite thing to drink?
Wine

If I could go anywhere, where would I go?
Home

Do you think you could live without me?
No

How do I annoy you?
Making loud noises

What is my favorite TV show?
Watching me!

What is my favorite music to listen to?
I don't know

What is my job ?
To keep me safe

How old am I?
60

What's my favorite color?
Pink

How much do you love me?
To Pluto and back!

Chapeau Aussi

Houston, We Have No Problem.

Audrey likes shoe shopping.

Musings

My Memoir Title:
My Life as a Mother or You Can't Properly Brush Your Teeth While Playing the Ukulele

for the blog

after having a fit at pump it up after i told her she couldn't have a vending machine drink

me: "Are you having sad feelings honey?"

she kicks me

audrey: "I hate you"

me: apparently a look of shock that quickly turned to "I KNOW YOU DIDN"T"

parent laughter... "that was a perfect moment"

November 26, 2016

Oh Boy.

While discussing name choices for Audrey's new unicorn Garrett suggested "Horny."

Wolf Scout

Hair Wax

Alli:

He doesn't know what this is and who put it in his hair.

Matt:

Huh? Sand from the playground?

Did he get into something he wasn't supposed to?

Alli:

Well, he said he didn't know what it was or how it got there. He could see that I was getting pissed that someone would do that to him. The more questions I asked, the more his story started to fall apart. Then I just asked him if there was a chance that he did it to himself because he thought it would be funny.

I got a mumbled meek, "yes," from the backseat.

Then I asked if it was a greater than 50% chance or less than 50% chance.

"Greater."

At least I know what it is, who did it, and as a bonus; we got some math in!

It's wax from one of those cheese discs.

Matt:

Oh man

So he did this to himself?

Alli:

Yes

Matt:

I'm not convinced I feel better about that than some other peckerhead doing it